Afraid of Having Two Under Two?

Someone asked me the other day if I was afraid or nervous in anyway of having two under two and having my little ones so close together in age? As I am 21 weeks pregnant today with our second I started seriously thinking about this question? Truth is...right now, in this moment, I don't know.

I don't really know...because I don't really know what to expect having two little ones so close together. It's almost just like how I didn't know what to expect with just having one. I didn't know that you are on call 24/7...7 days a week. I wasn't aware that you will never get a full 8 hours sleep again or when getting yourself ready to go somewhere comes completely last and lots of times you don't have time to really get ready the cute way you want to. I was blind to the fact that your dreams and goals are on the back burner and that you sometimes can't finish your meal...because either baby want's your undivided attention or only want's to eat off your plate. No one really told me that you sometimes will have to cut shopping trips or visits to a friend or family members house short because they are being too fussy...and that lot of activities revolve around their eating and napping schedules. I have been faced with passing up buying those cute sandals I have been waiting to get on my feet because I know I have to buy formula and diapers instead. There are times where I get bit because my little man is teething. I regularly get pooped on, peeped on, thrown up on, burped on, slobbered on, cried on, and scratched by his hang nails more than you can count on a daily basis. There are times where sitting down to type a blog is like a true miracle especially, times that by ten, if I get all my house work and laundry done for the day which is so rare because of chasing him around....and the list goes on.

Now times that all of that by soon to be two under two.

But...when I say all of that out loud. To me...and really any mother, its just a typical day in the neighborhood of motherhood. It doesn't raise any eyebrows or cause us to gasp. It doesn't really freak us out or scare us from having children or trying to get pregnant again with the baby #2, 3 or 4 heck for some even number 7. It's just what mothers do. It's instinct for us. Not gonna lie...having just one...is exhausting, its crazy, it's nuts at times. At times you want to pull your hair out if your little one wakes up one more time in the middle of the night. Sometimes you want to crawl up in the fetal position in the shower because their are just days when nothing you do will satisfy little man. You pick them up...and they want down. You let them down and they want to be picked up. You give them a bottle and they just want some cheerios instead. You fix them oatmeal for breakfast and they just want to play in it instead of eating it. You pull them away from danger and they throw a tantrum...like you rained on their parade. They fall off couches and beds, find lent to eat off floors, put bugs in their mouth, play in their diapers, eat their boogers, scream bloody murder in the other room only to find they were testing out their voice. They try to drink the bath water in the tub, and try to climb out of the tub. They can destroy a room in a matter of minutes only to be picked up and its destroyed again 30 minutes later...and all too frequently steam cleaning your carpets because of all their bodily functions that leak out some way or another is like a weekly family function.

So now we are getting ready to times all of that by two under two.

But, with that said...with just one...there are still those sweet tender moments where their giggle melts your heart. Where their first little words, the only words they can say and said often, just send you over the moon. Where their eyes light up and in doing so...so does your soul. Where they crawl or stumble over everyone in the room just to get to you. Where they reach up only to you for you to love them. Where they fall asleep only in mommy's arms. Where they rather lay on the couch with mommy at nap time than in their own cribs. Where each snore while they are sleeping is like the sweetest song ever heard.Where you see a little one out with their mother while you are out having some mommy alone time and it makes you want to rush home to them because you miss the heck out of 'em. Moment's where they reach a milestone and you are so proud. Where your heart breaks because they are hurt or sick. Where you spy on them while they are playing so contently in their rooms and it lights up your world to see them so happy and content.  The cute moments when you are awaken by a little finger going up your nose during nap time and you can't help but bust out in laughter. Those moments and so many more can not be measured, or calculated, numbered or bottled up.

Now times all of that by two under two!

To me...it makes the thought and the reality of soon having two under two so exciting and so worth every drop! Oh I am sure there are going to be many frustrating, exhausting, and stressful days ahead. Trying to manage a home, serve my husband and now having soon to be two under two to serve, raise, nurture, and love, but God has blessed us with these two little lives in such a short amount of time. When you know that children are a blessing from the Lord how could that really make anyone afraid?? The author and giver of life has entrusted us with their sweet little lives. He will not give us nothing more than we can handle...and I am completely humbled and honored by the fact that He knows we can handle it.

God has given us a double blessing!!

So let me revisit the question. Am I afraid or nervous of having two under two? I would be lieing If I didn't say I was a tad bit nervous. But, I can't wait!!!!